Still

I always let you get to me
I leave myself wide open
Maybe intentionally?
But I tried so hard to lie
Should’ve known you’d see it in my eyes
I didn’t want it to get complicated
To admit you leave me frustrated
I didn’t want it to change
My world is upside down, it’s strange
But I’m loving every fucking word you say
I miss you every day
And I feel it too
Don’t think I could ever get over you
My heart has never been so heavy
And I’ve never been less ready
I’m vulnerable, and I hate it
But it’s a hunger only you satiate
A feeling I reciprocate
I’m holding back
I’m holding back so hard
And I’m still failing
My emotions are derailing
I love you, why shouldn’t I declare it??
It’s simple, unethical to share it
But battle hearts and battle minds
Which do you choose to leave behind?
A chance in the dark
Or stable, common routine
Deciding won’t change how much you mean
It never has
It never will
And here I am, standing still

Ive never been more afraid to move